‘Courage in my Pocket’

Here we Go! I’m stepping out.    

This week marks a big step for me as I embark on a new journey, a journey that will require courage. What is that journey you might be thinking?  Short answer is, I’m attending my first International Writers Conference in North Vancouver.  I have always had a love for putting words to paper but stepping out and attending a conference with published authors, publishing houses and publicists is something out of my wheelhouse.  This   conference is something that most likely would have stayed on my ‘Wish List, neatly tucked next to my ‘Maybe One Day’ list, but something changed.  I changed.

I’ve decided, I’m going for it.   And I likely will need to borrow some courage.   I’ve decided I’m going to borrow the words Richard said to Elizabeth Gilbert in her famous book ‘Eat, Pray Love’ which are: ‘Groceries, do you want a wish bone or a backbone’. 

In an interview with Oprah, ‘The best thing Richard told Liz came about as she was mourning her most recent breakup. "I kept saying, 'I wish, I wish, I wish I still had my ex-boyfriend. I wish he still loved me.' And he said, 'Groceries, you've got to stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone ought to be,'" she says. "You can build your whole life on that line, you know? What are you—wishbone or backbone? Come on. Step up to it."¹ (in an interview with Oprah) 

I’ve too have decided to stop wishing and start living and that starts with me saying Yes to the writers' conference but I’m definitely taking some borrowed courage with me.  

Gathering reminiscent courage before I travel, I replay in my mind how in my early 20’s I stepped out and I took the stage at the First Miss Teen Pincher Creek Pageant.  In my role as the town’s local tourism promotions officer, magic happened, and I met a woman whose younger sister was the reigning Miss Lethbridge.  We came together with two other women and brainstormed. Well, the idea came to create and host the first Miss Pincher Creek Pageant.  This idea would be one that would bring high school girls together in a way that was co-operative rather than competitive.  We gathered local business, dance instructors, and had panelists that would mark the girls on qualities other than attributes of beauty and body.  We promoted the new project on TV, radio and the local newspaper highlighted the entire journey.  Everything came together, what started as an idea, and often borrowing each other's courage, we watched as the town came together to support and enjoy this First.  To my knowledge the Teen Pageant carried on for a few years after my term as tourism promotions office came to an end.    

I’ve stepped out onto other stages in my life, from school stages to conference stages.  As I’ve taken the stages, I can say that Courage has always been tucked in my pocket. Courage met me when I stepped out in my early 30’s.  I was SO nervous speaking at my first women’s meeting, that as I stood at the microphone, I was sure that everyone could see my butt cheeks shake!  It’s true, I was so nervous that my bum would not stop shaking.   I laugh today remembering that night, but I can still sense how much I wanted to speak and yet how nervous I was.  Finally, I decided rather than wishing my bum would stop shaking I’d have to courage up.  I said something along the lines of: ‘I’m really excited to be here and share but my body just needs a bit of time to catch up.’  As I said those words, I could feel the energy shift in the room and in my body.  Thankfully I could now focus on my topic. What was my topic? Courage? Nope, Breakthrough.  How applicable. 

This weekend, courage will still be tucked in my pocket both literally and figuratively as I step out, not onto, but into a new stage of life. 

Will you join me? 

¹ https://www.oprah.com/spirit/eat-pray-love-and-oprahs-book-club-announcement_1/all